I see a lot of my non-Christian friends live awesome lives. Their futures full of hope, joy and opportunity. I pray that I would be more bold in my pursuit of Christ to be a testimony to them that God has better. Is better. Loves better than we can ever dream or plan on our own.
It's scary for me to imagine my life without Christ. I mean sure, people do it. But why? What causes you to pull your head off the pillow each morning? Is it your job? Your family? Your pet? I get up at an unlawful hour long before the sun. When that alarm rings at 5:30 I CANNOT snooze it fast enough. But why do I do it? Get up?
For a brief moment it's just me. Before I check the weather or begin the "what to wear" battle in my head... I lay there and think about them. The kids I'll teach when I'm at work. The people I'll pass when I'm in the car. The friends I know all over this city and this world. Yeah right. All I'm thinking about in that moment is "why did I stay up so late?" But what if it was different. What if I fell out of my bed and onto my knees to give God my first. It would by no means be my best prayer of the day, but it would be a start.
Does anyone else brush their teeth in the morning for a mere 15 seconds just to say they did? And then at the end of the day do the full 2 minutes to compensate for it? Yeah, me neither. But really. Why is it all backwards? Our perspective has got to shift with EVERYTHING.
For about a year now an alarm has gone off on my phone every day twice a day. Once at 6pm to remind me to take a video for my memory project and once at 10pm to remind me to pray for my future spouse. I realized last week that while praying for "him" is important, maybe I should shift and start praying for me. Praying that I would be emotionally healthy. Spiritually healthy. Physically healthy for my future husband. That I would be kind, loving, patient, joyful, loyal, and that I would bring peace wherever I go. Of course I'll still pray for him but as I pray for me, I believe my shift in perspective will help deepen my desire to know Christ more.
I'm not in pain and I'm not living in pleasure but I can be ok with that.
